Today is Harry Potter’s 33rd birthday! Happy birthday, Harry!
This scene? Takes place in 4 years. Yeah, we’re old.
In honor of Harry and his creator/birthday twin J.K. Rowling, I am posting this absolute gem of a conspiracy theory: Harry Potter–Satan’s Wizard by the illustrious Pastor Mike Storti. I hope you like it; I love it. Originally, I was just going to provide a link, but there are so many wonderful tidbits hidden inside that I decided to do a piece-by-piece breakdown with my personal responses underneath. You can read the original in one piece above. Or you can watch me OMGWTFing below:
Harry Potter – Satan’s Wizard
Catchy title!
“Regard not them that have familiar spirits, neither seek after wizards, to be defiled by them: I am the Lord your God” – (Lev.19:31).
“And the soul that turneth after such as have familiar spirits, and after wizards, to go a whoring after them, I will set my face against that soul and I will cut him off from among his people” – (Lev.20:6).
Leviticus. *Sigh* They always lose me when they quote Leviticus. This is the same book that says eating seafood is an abomination.
“…For thy merchants were the great men of the earth; for by thy sorceries were all nations deceived” – (Rev.18:23).
Relevation quotes! Now this is what I’m talking about! Although it’s notable that in some interpretations, the word “sorceries” is replaced with “magic potions.” So transfiguration, divination, and DADA are perfectly acceptable in the eyes of the Lord. It’s those potions you have to watch out for.
Rapture Practice 