Hello and welcome to Rapture Practice, a charming blog about the End Times and probably other things as well! I should start by clarifying that I don’t personally believe in the Rapture, nor have I ever practiced for it. So, you may ask, why am I starting a blog about it?  Great question!

Why am I starting a blog about it?

Over the course of my deep and meaningful studies (which mostly consist of me derping around on the internet), I have come across some great apocalypses–zombie apocalypses, viral apocalypses, alien apocalypses, apocalypses brought about by natural disasters, and a whole host of other wonderful things.

But rarely have I encountered a good, old-fashioned Book-of-Revelation-style apocalypse. That is, most of the ones I have encountered have been presented in earnest seriousness by a writer who believes its really going to happen and wants to save our souls.  Rarely do I see a Revelation-style apocalypse presented purely because it’s fun, crazy, and weird, not to mention full of sea monsters, dragons chasing winged women around the sky, and fire-breathing people char-grilling their enemies.  Really, what’s not to like?

So, since the Biblical apocalypse is my favorite one, since I’ve been reading quite a bit about it lately, and since I really want someone to geek out over it with aside from conservative Christians who immediately use “Jesus is coming back!” as an excuse to hate on gay folks (no hating on gay folks allowed here!), I’m going to share my musings on this lovely blog!

Admittedly, a lot of the stories/movies/websites I cover will be supposedly serious sites created by premillenial dispensationalists, because that’s what’s out there.  (And if you don’t know what premillenial dispensationalism is, I’ll blog about that too!)  However, there are many other interpretations of the Biblical apocalypse, so I’ll try to include a little bit of everything I come across.  There will be some books, some movies, some supposed current events, and a lot of facepalming over things people do.  But mostly fun!  There will be a lot of fun!

That’s why I’m starting this blog.  Fun!  So … that answers your question, right?

Unless that wasn’t quite what you meant when you asked why I’m starting a blog about the Rapture (which I’m sure you totally asked).  Maybe you wanted to know…

Why am I starting a blog about it?

So maybe you were wondering what gives me the right to talk about this particular religious belief?  Am I a theology scholar?  Do I have a Master’s in Divinity?  Can I say “premillennial dispensationalist theology” 5 times fast without stumbling?  Well … no.  Definitely none of those things.

But what I lack in scholarly perspective, I make up for in personal perspective.

Growing up, I somehow managed to walk the line between devoted Catholic and hardcore sci-fi/fantasy fan.   Don’t ask me how that happened.  By high school, having read one-too-many Catholic visions of heaven, two-too-many escapist fantasy series’s, and sixteen-too-many Left Behind books, I was basically left with the idea that Jesus was going to come back any day now and shwoop us all up to heaven.*  (“Schwoop” is probably the sound it would make.) So I guess I did believe in the Rapture, although I never knew you could practice for it, or believe me, I would have been all over that like a Potterhead on a life-sized autographed cut-out of Daniel Radcliffe.

Today I can and do look back and laugh at the silly things I believed.  But believing in the Rapture wasn’t all fun and games. It involved a lot of angsting over the state of my soul.  Many of my nights looked like the “Spooky Mormon Hell Dream” from the Book of Mormon, but without the dancing Starbucks cups. (Catholics have nothing against coffee, you see.)

Eventually, though, I gained enough critical thinking skills to realize that the whole end-of-the-world thing didn’t really hold up to the harsh scrutiny of logic.  Neither did the whole Christianity thing (although I’m still a spiritual person and believe that organized religion has its merits).  But the Book of Revelation has always held a special place in my heart.  After all, lest you forget, there are still the sea monsters and dragons!

So, no, I’m not a scholar or an expert on Biblical theology.  But after all those years of letting the End Times terrify me, I feel that I’ve earned a chortle or two at its expense.

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